2 thoughts on “November 9 (Fallen leaves)

  1. aloha Melissa. sometimes it seems to me that i do a lot of what i call – Definition Haiku – (may be that’s what it is called officially but i really dont know). i think this ku would fall into that area of my thinking. i like it. i like it because it surprises me into thinking in a way i dont quite expect. it also works two ways at the same time – gutters clogged and not being able to speak because of…

    may be that’s always how Definition Haiku work – two ways?

    this also stands out to me because it doesnt tell the reader (me) what to think about clogged gutters or being tongue-tied. it simply shows me what is there. i like that. and altho it does connect up to being human, it does so in a non-personal yet universal personal way. is that good? heck if i really know, but it lets me be with the ku, contemplating rather than watching what is happening to someone else.

    am i just talking through the circle in my head here? probably. what do i know?

    cool on your ku.

    groggy mind ~
    this mountain veil
    of volcanic haze

    – i’m tempted to make the last line in this one – of vog. vog is a term that is as familiar and as well known here as the word smog is on the mainland. i dont know how familiar the word vog would be to mainlanders tho (mainland and mainlanders referring basically to anyone who is living on continents or off island, altho often it refers to people living in “the rest of the USA”). vog is basically volcanic haze that can drift across the islands and be seen against the mountains here when the Kona Winds blow across the land. …Kona Winds are basically the reverse of the usual direction of the wind here, which are known as the Trade Winds or The Trades – which are the breezes that keep the islands cool, fresh and pleasant. ha, did i need to add all of this? no. i’m rambling. i’m just rambling. i must have groggy mind.

    • Wow — thanks for teaching me a new word, Wrick. Yeah, I think you would want to save that term for an island haiku audience. 🙂 It’s cool, though — I’ll remember that the next time I need a word to rhyme with frog, or grog. 🙂

      “Definition haiku” — also a great term. Yeah … I tend to really like these too. I know some people hate them because they think they’re not concrete enough for haiku. But as you say — I think if you’re not really preaching, saying how to feel about something, but just saying what’s there, it’s in the spirit of haiku.

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