.
oh, he’s poorly–his
eyes starting out of his
eyes starting out
of a cloud, convulsing
(down in the depths)
of a dream, convening
names and numbers,
nodding off
overandover he
finishes before he starts,
thaws before he freezes,
wakes before he sleeps,
all his minds left
behind right
before afterwards
in spring, shorting
the cord, the bed,
indefinite and un
defined non
non non monsieur amour
rain falls,
rain will fell you,
good morning,
poorly one
.
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nice, Melissa.
I like how you re-create a state of mind rather than describe it,
a kind of nurseryrhyme refrain to it.
fall, fell, feeled, I think it goes
yeah, like Eve says, a rocking feel (some rocky still in it)
I like how each can be read alone and then read consecutively for deeper imagery. Moving and thought provoking.
Thanks, Eve, Mark, and Yousei for your very kind and perceptive comments.